"Well, Mrs. O'Connor, so you want a divorce?" the
solicitor questioned
his client. "Tell me about it. Do you have a grudge?"
"Oh, no," replied Mrs. O'Connor. "Shure now, we have a
carport."
The solicitor tried again. "Well, does the man beat you
up?"
"No, no," said Mrs. O'Connor, looking puzzled. "I'm always
first out of
bed."
Still hopeful, the solicitor tried once again. "Well, does
he go in for
unnatural connubial practices?"
"Shure now, he plays the flute, but I don't think he knows
anything
about the connubial."
Now desperate, the solicitor pushed on. "What I'm trying
to find out are
what grounds you have."
"Bless ye, sor. We live in a flat -- not even a window
box, let alone
grounds."
"Mrs. O'Connor," the solicitor said in considerable
exasperation, "you
need a reason that the court can consider. What is the
reason for you
seeking this divorce?"
"Ah, well now," said the lady, "Shure it's because the man
can't hold an
intelligent conversation."
